Friday, April 15, 2011

Boldly doing stupid stuff (so you don't have to)

I think I'm going to have to back up a few months to tell you about my latest failed experiment.  Well, it wasn't so much an experiment as a bad impulse buy.

But anyway...

First, a short book review:
A few months ago I read the book Organic Body Care Recipes by Stephanie Tourles and really enjoyed it.  I particularly loved the opening sections.  First, Tourles tells you how your skin, hair, sweat glands, etc. function.  And then she gives a fairly in-depth description of all the ingredients.  She tells you what they are, how they are produced, how they're useful, how to determine whether you're getting a quality product, who should not use it (pregnancy and some illnesses), etc. 

So much wonderful information!  I was in heaven!

Then, of course, what I had expected to be the meat of the book (but I should know better because I'm such a nerd) was the recipes and they were mostly for the sorts of things I could see myself using.  There was a section on things like douches I skimmed, but most of it was shampoos, cleansers, moisturizers and the like for various skin-types, hair-types, and lifestyles.

I was on the hunt for a specific recipe - something for very dry hands/knuckles, because mine were cracking and using lanolin, while effective (and also sort of resourceful since I had it around and have never found it useful in breastfeeding), is also kind of messy and annoying. 

By the time I had finished the book it was due back at the library, so I quickly jotted down the page number of the recipe I intended to make and re-requested the book from the library.  I waited and waited for the library to email me and tell me the book was waiting for me at the drive-up window (oh yes, our local library is awesome).

Well, according to the library's digital catalog, the book is now lost.  Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Okay, you're all caught up now.  But please allow me to digress momentarily with a motherhood story (you can, of course, skip to The Stupid if you'd like).

Boldly going to the mall with a three-year-old.  (And enjoying it!)
Yesterday I was out with the kids for our Thursday "adventures."  This week's adventures included a trip to the mall and a trip to the co-op (where it was the weekly discount day for members).  I know what you're thinking.  You're right, I am a little too crazy with the adventures.

Actually, it was quite a fun afternoon.  Bean had no clue what "the mall" meant, but he was sure we had to go there and "not. Target." (Target is at our mall, but he didn't understand.)  So we go in an entrance he's never been in (I thought going in through Target might actually bring on a meltdown...) and he's like, "There are wots and wots of stores.  So. many. stores."

Bean was stoked because we got him a pair of sunglasses and a case for said sunglasses (this was the goal of the adventure, in fact).  We walked out of the mall and he gets this Secret Agent tone and says, "stop, Mom.  We need to take out our sunglasses!"  We got to the car and he instructed me on putting my sunglasses away safely in their case so they don't "get 'stroyed."  And last night he told The Beast all about how we had root beer.  "There was a lady.  I think she worked at the mall.  And she had root beer!"

What I would have recounted was the tale of the very elderly woman who came over while we drank our root beer and gave Bean a book from her Chick-Fil-A kid's meal.  In response to his question of "what's that" she informed him it was a toothpick and he should avoid it because kids get them stuck in their jugulars and die.  There were gestures.  Then she looked at Squeak (asleep in the stroller) and told me she is from a family of twelve, but she had an 8-and-a-half pound baby 50 years ago and then she was "all done with that" (said with more gestures and some pointing to, uh, where babies come from). 

So anyway, root beer and sunglasses.

The stupid
We went to the co-op for various items, including moisturizer to get me through until I figure out a recipe to try or get ahold of the book.  Bean was chattering and, as usual, I couldn't complete a thought.  I had no clear plan for which moisturizer I would purchase.  I was ready to skedaddle, as I had just scoured for various vitamins and supplements because cold season had officially wiped us out of everything.

And then I spied this cocoa butter and jojoba (actually, it appears to be re-packaged or possibly re-formulated, as I can't find the actual packaging online of what I just bought yesterday and, ironically, it now says "soft cocoa butter" on everything I'm seeing online.  What.ever.).  I remembered both those items vaguely from the book, thought "oh whatever. I'll figure it out later," and essentially made an impulse buy.

It's completely solid at our current in-home temperature.  Solid like candle wax.  Rubbing it vigorously between my hands, as instructed on the tub, has not resulted in it being the consistency I desire nor a consistency I can really use.  It has mostly resulted in me launching solid globs of it all over the bathroom.

So now I need to figure out what to combine it with to make it as messy and inconvenient as the Lansinoh lanolin.

The one thing I like about it, though, is that it smells like chocolate.  Look on the bright side, right?

In any case, if anyone has any suggestions or thoughts, I'm open!  I have a lot of this stuff to figure out how to use...

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